December 3, 2007 | 10:14 A.M. EST
In my last column I said I wouldn't sneak a peek at the NEXTEL Cup Awards Banquet on television Friday night.
Well, since we got the Christmas tree and all the indoor decorations up in near record time, I found myself in front of the television a littler earlier than planned. So I surfed over the ESPN Classic to catch a short glimpse of the proceedings.
It was worse than I anticipated.
The first snippet I saw was unofficial NASCAR musical spokesperson Kelly Clarkson's performance. There was less shrieking and screaming at a haunted house I visited over Halloween.
The former American Idol winner sounded like she was yelling as loud as she could to not be drowned out by the band playing behind her.
And the shots of audience members Jeff Burton and Tony Stewart, both who looked like they'd rather be getting yelled at by Mike Helton, was priceless.
When I for some reason decided to come back to the telecast a while later, I was "treated" to the comedy styling’s of David Spade. Hard to believe, but he actually made me long for the return of Jay Mohr.
Unfunny and unenthused about sums up Spade's performance, which included nothing about NASCAR or the attendees, except for a few lame prom king and queen comments to Jimmie and Chandra Johnson.
Finally I came back for the grand finale, Johnson's acceptance speech which was about as cold and bland as a leftover pizza in the fridge.
I asked for it by turning on the television. But how NASCAR can continue to produce such a lackluster effort to celebrate its season is beyond me.