Camp Bubba

Howdy Y’all.

Hope y’all had a good weekend… I shore did. Spent the weekend in a camper over yonder at Lowe’s Motor Speedway and caught me the Busch race and Cup race live and in color.

Well, while me and a few thousand of my closest friends were slurpin’ down some pops in the middle o’the night, here’s some stuff we was talkin’ about and thinkin’ about…

*Now I done pointed out about 100 things NASCAR/ISC has done wrong in the past year – or was that in the past week? – but ain’t none of them as silly and money-hungry as this talk about movin’ The Winston from Charlotte to someplace like Richmond.

Nothin’ against Richmond – or even a Bristol or Texas – but are ya kiddin’ me? Y’all have got to be friggin’ kiddin’ me, right?

All of us know them Speedway Motorsports boys – Brutus and Humpster – kick NASCAR/ISC’s fanny in puttin’ on a good show, but could them NASCAR/ISC suits (they’re the same, ya know) be so embarrassed by it and so money hungry they’d actually take all of SMI’s hard work and move it elsewhere?

See, NASCAR/ISC brains is gettin’ sued by Texas fer not gettin’ a second date, so the brains figure this could stop that suit.

If that ain’t the direction, they’s thinkin’ maybe go to Richmond, where NASCAR/ISC makes the bucks instead of SMI.

Only problem there is, you’d be havin’ the sports all-star race in gosh dern Richmond!

Anybody in their right mind gonna tell me the fiesta in Richmond is gonna be anywhere close to what it is in Charlotte? Anybody got the nerve to tell me that? Heck no.

Instead of Speedstreet in Charlotte, we’ll be havin’ the Speeddirtroad in Richmond. Instead of Speedweeks, we’d be havin’ the Speed-Day-in-a-Half (cuz ain’t nobody wanna be in Richmond fer a whole dern week). And lastly, instead of partyin’ in downtown Charlotte and goin’ from cool bar to cool bar all night, we’d be spendin’ about an hour or so at some hotel bar listenin’ to a combo of disco and country music in Richmond.

Y’all might think that’s a knock against Richmond, but it ain’t. Richmond just ain’t Charlotte, and Bristol ain’t Charlotte, neither. Anybody wanna spend a week in Bristol? Even I can’t eat that much barbecue and grits.

*Speakin’ of NASCAR brilliance, y’all is gonna fine Kurt Busch $10,000 fer tellin’ the truth? Good plan y’all. Let’s teach these fellers that it’s OK to spin somebody out at 190 mph, but it ain’t OK to tell the truth about it. Ain’t no dern way that boy would ever have been fined had he not told the truth… admit it.

*What about this Earnhardt Jr. boy bein’ called a class act cuz he didn’t wreck that Newman boy in the Winston? Whatcha think about that?

Here’s my take… He is a dern class act fer not wreckin’ that Newman boy, and what in tarnation difference does it make whether he thinks he should be called a class act or not?

Look, anytime a feller has enough class to be faster and not run up and wreck the guy in front of’m in order to win the race, that’s friggin’ classy… whether he thinks it is or not.

Is the argument that he couldn’t have wrecked Newman, and thus we can’t tell whether it was classy or not? Silly argument, ain’t it. Certainly it’s completely obvious that had he not been a class act, he could have wrecked Newman if he wanted to.

I understand Little E not wantin’ to be called classy, it just don’t work fer the name Earnhardt (his daddy spent a ton of years gainin’ popularity by bein’ the opposite). What I don’t understand is folks not seein’ beyond that obvious stance.

*Speakin’ of obvious, could y’all media types spend one minute tryin’ to be creative enough to call these boys somethin’ other than “Young Guns?” Honest to gosh, I seen the words “Young Guns” in one publication 46 times in three days this weekend.

*Y’all reckon Jeff Gordon is actually sneakin’ into the No. 48 car just as events start, and Jimmie Johnson is sneakin’ into the 24? Don’t make sense otherwise, do it?

Then again, Johnson is from California and won at California. He’s sponsored by Lowe’s and wins the pole and is by far the best car at Lowe’s Motor Speedway. Hmmmm.

*Speakin’ of Hmmmmm… Matt Kenseth runs down Mark Martin like he’s standin’ still, but then fer 10 laps – before they hit lapped traffic – all the sudden his car ain’t as fast? Prolly has nothin’ to do with Mark bein’ a co-owner of his car and possibly bringin’ a million bucks into the Roush stables.

Think of it this way… a driver will slow down to let a teammate get a lap back, but he wouldn’t slow down to let a teammate win a million bucks?

I don’t believe in this conspiracy stuff, but shore is impossible to notice.

Thing is, I better be careful with talk like this, the rumor writers will have that on the tops of their lists by mornin’.

*Speakin’ of rumors… One publication has got Steve Park definitely gettin’ fired after the Coke 600’rd and before Dover. DEI says ain’t no way Park is gettin’ fired before Dover.

In my opinion (to teach some lessons fer once in this sport), one of two things must happen….
1. If the rumor writer is proven wrong, nobody in the garage area ever talks to this writer again cuz we’s tired of facts being only parts of stories (ok, that’s harsh, maybe just the rest of the year).
2. If DEI is proven wrong, every media source in the country writes about how DEI is a bunch of liars.

*Talked to my cousin Leeland over the phone Mondee and he was sayin’ FOX done an OK job of coverin’ the Coke race, but after havin’ DW in his ear fer 600 miles, havin’ Monday off to recover was a gift from God.

*Hey Kenny Wallace, instead of takin’ that Stacker 2 stuff (you’re skinny enough), how about tryin’ some of that Ritalin stuff fer yer hyperactivity? Not sure how it mixes with Mexican food.

*Y’all remember when Jimmy Spencer moved to another team this year and all the experts felt he was gonna do much better? I’m callin’ y’all experts out… cuz Bubba never forgets.

*All day Mondee I kept readin’ stories that talked about Little E’s toe-in or Little E’s toe-out problems. My cousin Skeeter has a toe-in and out problem too (walks real funny), so I feel fer Junior.

*What’s worse, the Crank it Up feature on FOX coverage, or the Crank it Up CD they keep pushin’ on us? When the best band on the thing is “Staind”, you know they didn’t quite get the big-name talent they was hopin’ for.

*On to Dover this weekend, and I’m shore glad of it. We might actually see some side-by-side racin’ fer the first time in weeks.

I’ll talk at y’all next week… I reckon.

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Monster Energy NASCAR Cup, 2002

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